Some Questions for Jane Austen

I am a big fan of Jane Austen.  I love the books (the ones I've managed to finish...it takes me awhile to read Classic Literature.)  I REALLY love the movies.  My favorite is the BBC version of Persuasion.

Anyway...I was having a Jane Austen marathon this afternoon.  I watched the 2006 theatrical version of Pride & Prejudice and the 2009 BBC version of Emma.  I was going to watch Persuasion, too, but it got too late.  After watching these, I have a few questions for Jane Austen:

1. Whatever happened to Mary Bennet?  Did she ever find someone to put up with her?
2. How long did it take until Mr. Wickham either left or killed Lydia?
3. Whatever happened to Caroline Bingley?
4. Did Emma and Mrs. Elton ever come to blows?
5. Whatever happened to Miss Bates?  I'd like to think she eventually found love.  Poor woman...
6. Who were Harriet Smith's parents?  Nobility?  Come on!  Spill it!!!

A couple of other random observations:

• I like the BBC version of Emma better than the 1995 Gwyneth Paltrow version.  For 2 reasons:  I like how it's so obviously through the entire miniseries that Mr. Knightly (Jonny Lee Miller) is in love with Emma (Romola Garai).  Just the way he looks at her!  Love it.  I didn't feel that in the 1995 version.  Also, I like how Frank Churchill's character is played out better.  I love me some Ewan MacGregor, but in the 1995 version, Frank is made out to be a total jerk.  In the 2009 version, not only is Rupert Evans freaking adorable, but they also treat the story with a little more...gentleness?  I don't know.  It's just better played to our sympathies than the older version.  You really feel bad for Frank and Jane.  And to see them happy after their engagement is announced is so nice.  In the 1995 version, you never see them again.
• I know most people think that the 1996 BBC version of Pride and Prejudice is the be all, end all version of the book.  And I like it.  I do.  But I really enjoy the 2006 Keira Knightly version.  Don't get me wrong...Colin Firth will forever and always be Mr. Darcy.  But there's just something about the 2006 version that I really like.  It's more succinct.  There's more realism.  It's...shorter.  (It's longer than the 4 hour Emma.  An hour longer.  Hey, don't judge me!  Yes, I know I will sit through 12 hours of The Lord of the Rings.  I'm complicated.)
• I am very excited to see Sense and Sensibility: The Musical at the Denver Center next year.
• I wish someone would do a modern adaptation of Persuasion.  Or maybe Persuasion: The Musical.  I would play Anne.  Now who should play Captain Wentworth?  Hmmm.....

And finally, I would just like to thank Jane Austen for writing her amazing books.  She really nailed it on the head when it came to social commentary of her own time...and our time, too!  And she really did write the best romance.  She didn't have much in the way of her own romance and she always made sure that her heroines had a happy ending.  Thanks, Jane!  You're the best!